I Struggled this Week

Apr 08, 2023

Read time: 2.5 minutes

Every Saturday for the last 36 weeks I've sent a newsletter with strategy, insights, and tactics to help you grow your business and help more people.

Whether it's been helping you change the way you think about getting your message out or giving you exact posts that will get you (almost) guaranteed higher engagement, I haven't missed a week.

  • When I was in Italy and forgot my laptop charger? I still sent an email.
  • At my parents' on Christmas Eve? I didn't miss it.
  • New Year's Eve? Yep, I delivered.

But this week has been a real struggle.

The email I'd pre-written ahead of time about how to structure a program that delivers results felt off. I spent 4 hours staring at this screen last night trying to force some new "business wisdom" worth sharing. It didn't happen.

I have other things on my mind and talking about anything else feels disingenuous.

My mom's not well. She's been in the hospital for the last three weeks and I've been visiting her as much as I can while still balancing all the stuff in my growing business. Every visit is different.

Some days, we listen to the 70s music she loves.

Other times, she reminds me of the stupid ways my brother and I got into trouble as kids. On Monday, I held her frail hand while she shared the story of how her and pops met. I listened as if I'd never heard her tell the tale of how she declared to my grandma she was going to marry my dad the first time she saw him across the room.

Thursday she and I took a nap.

Her in her bed and me on her hospital room sofa chair that extends out into a single bed. I was exhausted. She was simply happy having company while she snoozed.

It's been raw, emotional, sad, and beautiful.

And I've been getting through it by reminding myself that I want the full human experience. I'm not here to numb myself and coast. I'm here for the full life package that inevitably includes exhilarating highs and emotional lows.

This embracing of the full human experience has been trickling over into other areas of my life this week:

  • When I got caught in an insane rain storm, I laughed. I walked into the coffee shop with wet feet, jeans that were completely soaked, and a smile on my face.
  • When my partner Melissa randomly asked me to sing her a song, I belted out a French childhood tune that I haven't sung in decades.
  • I did a group call with my community on Wednesday where I was so consciously present that I could feel my body vibrating.

I'm here for all of it.

Including being present in the messy, unpredictable, and hard moments.

P.S. Should you ever find yourself having to frequently visit someone you love at the hospital, I recommend finding a way to shift your energy and change your state before you drive home. It could be as simple as taking a few minutes to remind yourself of three things you're grateful for (and actually feeling that gratitude for a moment). Why? It'll greatly reduce the likelihood that you passionately give a one finger salute to a stranger who honks at you for not making a dangerous left-hand turn.

You can make your own conclusions as to why this example is so specific. 😂

I'll see you next week.


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